Of all the dead rellies I’ve been writing about as I research Bridget’s murder; I’m fondest of Bridget’s mum, Hanorah Talty O’Callaghan.

Perhaps it’s because Hanorah’s picture has gazed benignly down at me from my grandmother’s, and then my mother’s, wall for decades.

It could also be the obvious resemblance she bears to my own grandmother, Cecilia.  There’s something in the shape of the face and the hint of a twinkle in the eyes.

Mostly, I think it’s the way my grandmother used to talk about Hanorah.  There was a warmth to Cecilia’s voice when she dwelled on the memory of her “Grannie”. “Grannie was fun," Cecilia would say.

The contrasts, then, between Hanorah’s life and that of Bridget, her youngest child, could not be starker.

Hanorah would die at the venerable old age of 90.[1]  During her long life, she had 8 children, an opportunity denied her youngest daughter. [2]  Hanorah would ultimately outlive all but 3 of her children, which must have been its own kind of tragedy. [3]

If there’s a frisson of intrigue that attaches to Hanorah for we later generations, it’s to do with the age of the man she married.

Bridget ultimately chose a man who was 13 years her senior as her husband.[6]  Hanorah declared herself to be 25 to her prospective husband's age of 22 on their wedding certificate. [7] That’s the fiction she maintained maintained on every other official document of hers I’ve found.

In fact, Hanorah would have been 32 when she married, a decade older than her spouse.

Then, as now, a woman who was older than her husband would have attracted comment.

A woman unwed in her early 30s? Snapped up a 22-year-old lad, did she?  What was wrong with her?  Doesn’t say much for the lad, either.   

Now we’d saucily dub Hanorah a “cougar” and waggle our eyebrows suggestively.  What kind of a woman must she have been?  Heh heh.[8]

What strikes me most is the relative experience differential between Hanorah and Bridget on the date of their respective marriages.

Hanorah was 32 when she wed.  She’d quite literally travelled the world when she crossed the seas from Ireland to Australia in 1876.[9]  She’d set herself up with a new life in a new country, leaving behind the comfort of family and home. 

Bridget was not quite 21 she wed.  Her life, until then, was entirely contained by the familiar surrounds of family and Hendon.

My figure was better at 21 but everything else – judgement, confidence and skills – was vastly improved by age 32.  I can’t help but wonder, if Bridget had seen and experienced more of the world, would she have ended up with Henry?

In the end, I prefer to emphasise their similarities.  Bridget’s and Hanorah’s choice of husbands both must have raised eyebrows at the time of their respective weddings.  I like women of spirit who dare to risk societal, or family, disapproval.

Perhaps, like her mother, Bridget was also fun and a mischievous twinkle lurked in her eyes.

#WildBridgie

End notes

[1] Moulder, B. Hanorah O'Callaghan. 2023. Family Portrait, Created in Canva.

[2] Death Certificate of Hanorah Talty O’Callaghan, 25 June 1939, Queensland Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages, Brisbane, Queensland. Death Certificate.

[3] "Obituary" Warwick Daily News (Qld. : 1919 -1954) 30 June 1939: 7. Web. 8 May 2024, http://nla.gov.au/nla.news-article187906816.

[4] "Obituary" Warwick Daily News (Qld. : 1919 -1954) 30 June 1939: 7. Web. 8 May 2024, http://nla.gov.au/nla.news-article187906816.

[5] Moulder, B. " Hanorah O'Callaghan's Grave." Photograph. 25 March 2022.

[6] Marriage Certificate of Bridget Mary O’Callaghan, 17 November 1913, Queensland Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages, Brisbane, Queensland. Marriage Certificate.

[7] Marriage Certificate of Hanorah Talty, 22 April 1882, Queensland Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages, Brisbane, Queensland. Marriage Certificate.

[8] Sadly, we remain firmly in the grips of patriarchy. An older woman marrying a younger man is considered scandalous but a younger woman married to an older man seems quite normal. Hurrah for gender equity.  

[9] "Assisted Immigration 1848 to 1912." Queensland Government Data, Queensland Government, https://www.data.qld.gov.au/dataset/assisted-immigration-1848-to-1912/resource/fe6f1bf9-6d70-4859-a90f-cae1e2eea378. Accessed 12 May 2024.